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Home > Self-help

Self-help

Knowledge and understanding

self reflection.

Learning about unusual experiences can be vital in being able to help oneself. If a person has ideas about the way their unusual experiences impact them and how they make sense in the context of their life this can provide a foundation from which to build. Researching experiences can help in understanding them as well as finding others who may have been through the same, or a similar, thing and may offer insights and ways of moving forward or coping.

Understanding can develop out of knowledge and can enable self-reflection, self-compassion and self-acceptance.

Self-reflection

Finding out more about oneself, our way of being, how our thoughts and feelings drive what we do and the inner workings of our minds can all be beneficial in figuring out what sorts of things may help us to cope in times of struggle.

Self-reflection can be done in many formats but typically includes taking note of events, emotions, thoughts and beliefs as they happen and then spending time considering them to gain insights about oneself e.g. thinking about what happened from ones own perspective, how others might have viewed it and whether it went well or not, including what could be done differently in the future.

Self-compassion

scrabble letters saying 'Self care'.

Compassion is the notion of feeling with someone and acting to alleviate their suffering. Self-compassion is when we seek to do this for ourselves. Generally people struggle more with self-compassion but this is something we can develop with practice.

A good way to start is to think about responding to friend who was facing the same struggle. What would the response be and how can this be turned towards the self?

Sometimes people think self-compassion means doing anything to alleviate suffering but it doesn’t. Rather it should be about developing self-kindness as well as self-discipline and seeking to find a balance within this.

Self-acceptance

Acceptance is the idea of recognising what is happening, without feeling the need to change it or fight against it. Self-acceptance is a way of embracing oneself, from the qualities we like about ourselves to those we really don’t and everything in-between.

A good way to start is by thinking about our values, strengths and weaknesses. It can be helpful to get input from the people around us during this process. What do we already do in our daily life that lives up to these and what else could be added?

This ability to accept oneself as we are is often liberating. However, it doesn’t mean we stop seeking to learn and grow but we can do so from a place of greater wisdom and awareness.

Mindfulness, meditation and breathing exercises

someone meditation.

Many people find mindfulness, meditation and breathing exercises incredibly valuable but they require time and practice. These skills, although seemingly straight forward, are often challenging.

It’s helpful to practice these during times that are not stressful, distressing or overwhelming so that the groundwork has been established in times of need.

These skills can provide greater self-awareness, improved resilience to stress and enhanced cognition.

For some people, as these skills are developing, it can bring up deeper questions. It can be helpful in this case to have someone trustworthy to guide the process and discuss experiences.

Mindfulness, meditation and breathing exercises are not for everyone, some people do not find any benefit and may even find it harmful. This is particularly relevant for individuals having unusual experiences, so be careful and stop if it makes things worse.

Health and wellbeing

healthy food.

Maintaining health and wellbeing are both an important part of managing unusual experiences. These areas of life can be disrupted or affected if unusual experiences become overwhelming.

Having a healthy lifestyle, doing the things that maintain wellbeing, cultivating hobbies or interests and keeping to a beneficial routine are important for remaining in touch with day to day living.

Prioritising health and wellbeing may seem obvious but it is often the first thing that starts to fall away when feeling overwhelmed. Try to set time aside everyday to invest in this crucial aspect of self-care.

This is a broad topic and there are many courses on this site that discuss various aspects of it. Below there is a list of links to courses to get started but please note there are many other courses available on this site which look at specific topics in terms of wellbeing, for example running and wellbeing, writing and wellbeing, positive psychology, nature and wellbeing, etc.

Other courses

You may be interested in the following courses which you can access via the main courses page.

  • For more information about lifestyle go to the Lifestyle & Recovery Series.
  • For more information about building a healthy routine go to the Creating a Routine for Positive Change course.
  • To get start with information about wellbeing go to the Five Ways to Wellbeing course.
  • If you’re a student and want more specific information within that context go to the Health and Wellbeing for Students course.

Grounding techniques

Feeling grounded can be a very important part of managing unusual experiences as they can leave a person feeling a sense that things are unreal in some way.

There are many ways to ground oneself and it can be helpful to try different methods to see which are most beneficial. Some examples include:

  • Connecting with your senses, for example list things you can see, hear, taste, smell and touch.
  • Smelling a familiar scent, for example perfume, hand lotion.
  • Splashing cold water on your face.
  • Walking barefoot on earth or grass.
  • Being in nature.
  • Looking at a photo album with fond memories.
  • Interacting intentionally with family, friends or pets.

Support groups

There are lots of support groups that exist to support people who have unusual experiences. These groups are peer support based and consist of people with unusual experiences coming together to share their experiences and seek support from others in a confidential setting. Examples of these include:

  • The Hearing Voices Network (HVN).
  • The Spiritual Crisis Network (SCN).
  • Recovery colleges.
  • Charity led groups, for example Mind.

Lived experience

'When first attending a group for people with voices it seemed scary, I wasn’t sure who I would meet and even though I had fought against the stigma of my diagnosis I was scared about meeting people with the same one. But that first time went fine, I met people that helped me in my journey. Listening and empathising with my condition and offering real useable advice that made a difference on the day. Some times at the groups I have attended mental health doesn’t even come up it has become a very social and accepting place. I feel like I can talk very differently in the groups as the understanding I get there doesn’t compare to anyone or anything else I know. I feel that attending such groups has been critical to my recovery journey.'

Anonymous

Consider more:

  • Do you feel knowledgeable about your unusual experiences? 

  • Which of the ideas above do you think might benefit you? 

  • Can you think of any other things you could try?